Some of you probably remember the sitcom “Gomer Pyle, USMC.” It ran from 1964 to 1969 and still runs in syndication on ME TV. Anyone who has seen it will recall the Sergeant on the show asking questions of the recruits and yelling “I can't hear you” when they answer. He wanted them to yell back loudly, “Sir, yes, sir.” 

Ol’ Dutch has his own version of that going on. As a lot of you know, I have bad hearing loss due to being on locomotives for many years. Back in the early days working on the railroad, we didn't have hearing protection, so everyone suffered hearing loss in some form or another. For most of us, it was severe and not helped by hearing aids. 

So, this makes it hard to communicate with others of course and Ol’ Dutch has a heck of a time hearing women in particular due to their normally soft voices. Luckily, Miss Trixie was a CEO-type person and can use her commanding voice to get through to Ol’ Dutch most of the time. Thanks to that loudness and my ability to read lips, we got by. But if it's dark or if someone is wearing a mask, it is hopeless to make sense of what is happening. 

Because of that situation – well, at least I am giving Trixie the benefit of the doubt – she often repeats herself over and over, in ever increasing volumes, so that Ol’ Dutch makes it on time to appointments, does not cross the center line when driving, shows up for meals on time, knows when the important birthdays are, gets gifts for the worthy among us and a myriad other things she reminds me of daily, if not hourly. 

Even as hard of hearing as I am, sometimes Ol’ Dutch is hitting on all cylinders and gets the memo the first time around and her “reminders” turn into “harping” on me, and a rhubarb ensues. (That's what they called it when a fight broke out in baseball game way back when.) 

My own grandpa, when pressed to get something done around the house by my grandmother, would tell my dad, “Freddy, she’s dinging on me.” I mean honestly. Just because he hadn't got around to changing a light bulb in six months doesn't mean he wasn't going to do it. Most of us can relate to that. I mean, really. 

In life with Trixie, we have a little “dinging” going on, too. Given enough time, even Ol’ Dutch will get around to that light bulb, broken something or whatever it is Miss Trixie is dinging me about. Mostly I just forget, and it may take hundreds of memos before I finally do fix it, burn it, throw it away, sell it, buy it or whatever it is that needs my attention. 

Now, to her insistence that she doesn't do that, I have to call foul as all women do that to their men. It's just the nature of the beast. And I will probably awaken said beast once she reads this, too.  

Her momma used to try and warn me about making Miss Trixie mad, but I told her “I am the one man on this Earth who is not afraid of that woman.” And due to my good nature, great looks and bubbling and vibrant personality, Miss Trixie and I are coming up on 13 happy years together. Well, “13 years” anyway. 

Soon we will be pointing ourselves Westward returning to Colorful Colorado for the Summer Season. It will be a summer of whitewater rafting jobs, picnics, fishing, and endless games of Sequence with Gidget and Moon Doggy. 

Now, if only I could get Miss Trixie to reply, “sir, yes, sir,” when I speak. 

(And that's when the rhubarb began.) 

Kevin Kirkpatrick spends his days fishing, hunting, ATVing, hiking or making people laugh. His email is Kevin@TroutRepublic.com. Additional news can be found at www.troutrepublic.com.